The Last Night
by Kate Shephard
Summary: This is the last night you'll spend alone. Look me in the eyes so I know you know. I'm everywhere you want me to be.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own LOST or any of its characters. They belong to Damon, Carlton, ABC, ect.

The Last Night belongs to Skillet.

* * *

"Katherine, damnit, you're using all the fucking hot water!" A fist shook the flimsy, wooden door as it pounded. There was a cracking noise, the break by the door handle expanding another inch. "I'm gonna come in there and break the damn shower head off. That'd teach ya, wouldn't it? Turn it the hell off or I ain't even goin' to let you in there anymore! I don't give a shit if you'll have to bathe with the garden hose and piss in your own damn trashcan!"

"Leave the poor girl alone, Wayne," her mother's voice intervened. "She's twenty-three. You can't control how long she's in the shower for. Especially after…"

"I can control anything I want, Woman!" A smack. An easy indication the man's strong hand had flown across the fragile woman's cheek.

The water turned off, but the young girl still stood in the grimy tub. She leaned forward with her forehead pressed against the wall, choking back the bile that continuously rose in her throat as she rubbed her skin red and raw with what might at one time have been considered a washrag. "It's off!" A quivering voice betrayed the strength she swore she'd feign. "It's off." Her face crumpled and she sunk to the ground, curling up in the corner of the shower as she struggled to suck in the steamy air that surrounded her. "It's off." Her voice turned to a whisper and she brought up a hand to cover her mouth, sobbing in silence and rocking herself for a brief moment.

"Do it, Kate." This voice came from within herself, speaking menacingly in her head. "He won't be able to touch you anymore if you do."

"No," she whispered, shaking her head. "I won't. Not anymore."

"Take the time to think about it. Is life really worth it? Are you happy? Every evening you come home to him. You don't have enough money to ever escape. It'll always be the same. You come home and hide in your bedroom as you listen to the cries from the adjacent room. And then your door will creak open, just like it always does. You'll stare at that exact same light from the hall. The one that breaks into the darkness. But what is light, Kate? Light doesn't destroy darkness. It just leads the evil into your room. And he'll walk inside with that crooked smirk on his face, the right side of his lip raised above the left. He'll squint his eyes at you and even if it's still too dark to see, he'll tell you you're beautiful. Every night for the rest of your pitiful life, Kate. He'll stare at you and you'll avoid looking at him, trying to focus on anything else in the room. Anything that isn't him gandering at you. And he'll step forward and place his calloused hands on your arms then slowly move them down to your…"

Kate let out a yell. "Enough!" The feeling of his fingers groping her wasn't one that could be easily washed away and it wrenched her belly in knots until it couldn't be twisted any further. She lurched forward, arms clutching her stomach. Her nose and throat burned as she vomited, trying desperately to aim over the open drain so the water wouldn't need to be turned on to wash it down. Tears stung her eyes as she squeezed them shut, heaving even after her stomach could no longer empty itself.

"Do it."

Lifting her head, she slid the back of her hand across her mouth. "I can't." She reached up and pulled the razor down from the shelf. With one snap, the plastic was broken and the blade was in her hand. A tear fell upon it as she stared down into what she could see of her distorted reflection. She glanced at her wrists, three lines on the left and five on the right. "No." She got to her feet, placing the silver blade on the sink.

The clothes she dressed in after she had dried off consisted of only a pair of dark sweatpants and an over-sized jacket. The bathroom had become cold and the steam had faded out and she stood there still, staring clearly at the almost glittering object. The tiniest thing that could make the biggest difference in her life. Picking it up again, she held it close to her face to almost examine it before tucking it in the pocket of her coat. She couldn't do it here. And there was some unfinished business that needed to be taken care of first. On the way out, the only stop she made was in the hall to slip on her shoes.

_You come to me with scars on your wrist  
You tell me this will be the last night feeling like this_  
_**I just came to say goodbye  
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine**_  
_But I know it's a lie._

A dim light shone through the curtain of his house. It was a mansion compared to the trailor she resided in. Emotions locked in a box, she raised her fist to the door and wrapped lightly. "Jack, it's Kate." She turned the door handle and let herself in, turning and shutting the door behind her. She faced the living room, her eyes landing on the couch where the young man was fast asleep. The corners of her lips twitched upward into an almost smile. For a moment, she considered writing him a note instead of waking him. It wouldn't be fair though. After making her way over to him, she knelt down in front of the couch. Resting her arm over his that was draped over his stomach, she put her chin down on his hand. "Hey," she whispered, looking up at him.

His eyes opened and he glanced down at her before closing them again and yawning. "Hey, Honey." His free arm slid around her back, fingers tracing small circles against the material of his jacket as he attempted to wake himself up. "Sorry. If I knew you were coming over, I would have…"

"It's okay. I'm not staying long. I know you have a lot to do tomorrow, with packing and stuff." She buried her face against his chest, silently inhaling the smell of his cologne. "I thought I'd come to say goodbye tonight." Her voice was muffled by his shirt, but audible enough that she knew he could understand her. The box was coming unlocked and she fought to keep how she felt buried inside. "I just had to say goodbye."

_This is the last night you'll spend alone  
Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
I'm everywhere you want me to be.  
The last night you'll spend alone,  
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,  
I'm everything you need me to be._

He sighed, sliding his fingers through her hair. "Stop this. You act like this is the last time we'll see each other. I'm only going an hour away. Yeah, I have school, but I'll come here every weekend for you. I promise. And if you really need me on weekdays, I'll be here for you. It's not going to be like you think it will, Kate."

"I can't do it anymore, Jack." She shook her head, feeling sick again. "I'm not going to be able to do it when you're going to be an hour away instead of a minute away. I'm going to end it. I'm going to miss you too much." Her voice lowered to a strangled whisper. "I need you here and you're going away. And I just need it to end. I need him to go away."

_Your parents say everything is your fault  
But they don't know you like I know you they don't know you at all_  
_**I'm so sick of when they say  
It's just a phase, you'll be ok, you're fine**_  
_But I know it's a lie._

Jack lifted her head to look look at her. "Has that bastard been touching you again?" The trembling of her chin was enough of an answer. "How many times?"

"Jack, I…"

"Tell me." His voice was gentle, but forceful at the same time. "How long has it been going on without you telling me?"

"It just started again this week." Kate rushed to continue. "My mom says he's been having a hard time at work. And I instigate him, Jack. I try not to, but I…"

"There's no buts, Kate," Jack cut her off. "Nothing you could ever do deserves that kind of sick punishment, do you understand me? He's sick and no matter what your mom says or what you do, he has no right to do that. I'm calling the police. I should have called the first time you ever told me." He eased her off of him and sat up, reaching to grab the phone.

"Jack, please! You can't!" She grabbed his hand before he could lift the phone from the receiver. "It's okay. I'm okay. I won't do anything. I'll be alright."

He let out a harsh breath, turning her hand over and looking at the scars. "You call this alright?" He ran his thumb over the skin, tightening his grip when she tried to pull away. "Sweetheart, look at what they're doing to you. Look at the cuts you made on your wrist trying to get away. How much do you weigh now, Kate? How many nights a week do you sit for hours under freezing water in the shower just puking your guts up because you can't stop feeling him? How many times have…"

"Okay." She let go of his hand, pressing her own hands to her eyes. "Okay."

"You're beautiful, Kate. You are the smartest, most amazing, most gorgeous person I have ever met in my entire life. And I couldn't ask for anything more except to be able to see you happy and smiling. I want you to be able to smile at me and mean it."

_This is the last night you'll spend alone  
Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
I'm everywhere you want me to be.  
The last night you'll spend alone,  
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,  
I'm everything you need me to be.  
_  
_The last night away from me_

She was crying. He didn't need to be able to see her face to tell. Wrapping his arms around her, he slid her up onto the couch beside him. "Hey," he whispered in her ear before pressing his lips against the side of her head. "It's going to be okay." He pulled away and tucked her hair behind her ears. "I love you so much. Do you love me, Kate?"

"More than I could ever love," she whispered through her tears. "More than anything."

_The night is so long when everything's wrong  
If you give me your hand I will help you hold on  
Tonight,  
Tonight._

He took her hands and slid of the couch, kneeling in front of her and looking up at her face. "Can I talk to you about tomorrow?"

She closed her eyes for a brief moment to hold back the tears, but nodded her head. She had a feeling even if she said no, he was going to discuss it with her anyway.

"Good. I really wanted you to come help me finish packing. I had some money set back and was even going to take you somewhere special for lunch. Wherever you wanted to go." He smiled at her. "I bought you something too. I was going to hide it in a box and surprise you."

"You didn't have to buy me anything. You know I hate surprises." She shook her head. "Really hate them."

"Well I bought you something anyway. And since you're already upset, I think I'll save you from the surprise." He reached up to stroke her cheek and said,

"_This is the last night you'll spend alone  
Look me in the eyes so I know you know  
I'm everywhere you want me to be.  
The last night you'll spend alone,  
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,  
I'm everything you need me to be._"

He reached over and from the coffee table grabbed a small, black box, opening it to reveal a ring. "I'm not going to leave you here. I want you to move with me. Marry me, Kate Austen?"

"Oh, God." Her hand flew to her mouth, tears streaming freely down her face. "Yes," she whispered. "Yes."

He pulled the ring from the box then took her hand and slid the ring on her finger,

"_I won't let you say goodbye,  
I'll be your reason why._"

_The last night away from me,  
Away from me._


End file.
